Compliments are gifts.
When someone gives you a really nice gift that you're not sure about, you accept it and say 'thank you' because that's what we've been told to do and what is acceptable, that is polite. You wouldn't say 'I'm sorry can you take this back because I don't like it'. Well, I mean some people would, but I think that the social norm is to accept the gift and be grateful- it's the thought that counts right?!
People refuse compliments like an unwanted gift.
They ignore, dismiss, argue, rebound it, question and devalue themselves.
Why is it so bad to accept a compliment?
I know I'm the same- I struggle to take a compliment.
Fear of being smug or feeling like you owe them, (like if someone buys you a gift and you feel like you have to buy them one back). Perhaps its low self esteem or false modesty. Or again is is a social norm to not accept compliments? Is it just women, because I would beg to differ?
My guess is that more than half of us do it. But by doing this we make the person giving us the compliment feel awkward and may not want to compliment you again. You make yourself feel rubbish because you can't accept that someone else see's differently to what you see.
So, in all honesty you're not doing anyone any favours. Not your friend/ partner/ mother, whoever and certainly not yourself.
Next time someone compliments you- just say 'Thank you' or 'That really means a lot'. Even if you don't particularly believe it, its still is heartwarming.
What are your thoughts on this topic? Can you take a compliment? Why/why not?
Until next time...
Love C. xx
P.s You have a beautiful smile, share it :)
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